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The Silent Storm in Indian Families

Over the last 11 years of deep work at Holistree, I’ve sat across countless children, teenagers, parents, and even grandparents. And if there’s one thing I’ve come to understand, it’s this :

We’re all a little lost right now—just in different ways.

And this isn’t about one generation being right or wrong.

This is about a quiet but powerful shift that’s rippling through Indian families—and many are not prepared for it.


The Old Code: Respect by Role

Growing up in India, we were taught something very clearly:

If someone is older than you—or holds a role like parent, teacher, uncle, or grandparent—you respect them, no questions asked.

Their title mattered more than their thinking or actions.

But in the last 15–20 years, things have shifted dramatically.

Information is flowing. Awareness is rising. Kids today have exposure we never did.

And suddenly, these “untouchable” roles are being questioned.


Kids Are Questioning Everything

Today’s children aren’t scared to ask:

  • “Why do I have to do this?”

  • “Why can’t I talk about how I feel?”

  • “Just because you’re older, does that mean you’re always right?”

They’re not being disrespectful.

They’re simply seeking alignment, meaning, and truth.

But the older generations—especially grandparents and even parents—were never prepared for this kind of direct questioning.


Parents Are Stuck in the Middle

Many parents I work with are going through their own identity storm.

They’re sandwiched between the old conditioning of their parents and the new awareness of their kids.

They’re navigating marriage, career, parenting, and self-worth—all while trying to learn things they were never taught:

  • How to communicate with awareness

  • How to allow space for emotions

  • How to evolve instead of react

Some are questioning the life they’ve been living for 15–20 years and more.

But they often feel stuck between guilt and confusion.


Grandparents Are Feeling Shaken

Now imagine being 60+ and being told that much of what you believed in—your parenting style, your values, your emotional expression—might have been unhealthy or suppressive.

That’s deeply unsettling.

A lot of grandparents now feel invalidated, disrespected, or just shut out.

They’ve never been taught to process these feelings, and now they’re struggling to find their place in a world that’s shifted without warning.


Three Generations. Three Different Crises.

Here’s what’s really happening in many homes:

  • Kids are dealing with anxiety, self-image, and confusion—trying to heal from what’s been passed down.

  • Parents are in transition—questioning their lives, roles, and beliefs while holding the emotional load for the family.

  • Grandparents are grieving silently—the fading of a world they built and believed in.

And the real danger? Denial.


Denial Is the Easy Way Out

It’s easy to blame:

“It’s social media.”

“This generation is weak.”

“In our time, we didn’t have these issues.”

But denial won’t make it go away. It only buries it deeper—until it explodes somewhere else.


The Only Way Forward? Reflect. Rethink. Reinvent.

After over a decade of sitting with hundreds of families, I can say this with conviction:

No matter your age, the only way to move through this storm is to become a student of life again.

That means:

1. Reflect
  • What beliefs am I holding on to?

  • Are they serving me—or harming me and my relationships?

2. Rethink
  • Can I look at the same situation with a different lens?

  • Can I choose understanding over ego?

3. Reinvent
  • Can I allow myself to evolve?

  • Can I make peace with not knowing everything?


Let’s Drop the Guard. And the Labels.

It doesn’t matter if you’re a parent, a grandparent, or a 16-year-old.

All of us are human first.

And we’re all allowed to change.

When even one person in the family starts to reflect and grow, they create space for others to follow.

That’s how healing begins—not through blame, but through humility.


This silent storm is real.

But it can become a turning point—if we’re willing to listen, learn, and lead with love.


 

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